3.03.2006

Local long distance

I’ve had nearly a full week of the work-class one-two punch, and although I’ve had a few moments of “what day is it?” (this morning I remained confused for a good five minutes, trying to solve the February? March? August? puzzle), my initial thoughts are that this may be doable. Never mind that I’m feeling a little strung out and dehydrated this morning, and the only thing keeping my eyeballs from plopping out onto the keyboard is the fact that they’re so dry they seem to have velcroed themselves to my eyelids.

Every Sunday night for the next four-to-six months, Monk and I will bid each other goodnight and bravely go through the “See you Friday” exchange. At first. this prospect seemed less than thrilling, until I remembered that most of the years we’ve had together have involved various hectic schedules which created very little (to zero) time together throughout the week. And it’s obvious logic that the less you have of something, the more you appreciate it when you can get your hands on it. If our friends think we’re homebodies now, just wait. Everyone will suspect that we are spending our weekends gazing adoringly into each other’s eyes and rhapsodizing over which one of us loves the other more (which, barf).

Most interestingly, I’ve learned that we become Great Phone People when our schedules keep us apart all week. Great Phone People are those rare folks that keep up such lively banter throughout a telephone conversation that you get off the phone feeling nearly invigorated, and also like you just polished off a big piece of your favorite pie. Monk and I have become those Great Phone People with each other (again) and it’s fantastic. In the morning now, we efficiently go over household tasks, tell dog stories, sympathize with work vents, etc. We touch base throughout the day to make sure we’re still on the same page. Yesterday the conversation hit the perfect hilarious pitch, and we were both in tears. Sure, you’re thinking, that’s nice, but why are you so astounded? Well, people, I’m astounded because here is what I’ve come to expect on an average day, from a phone call with my spouse:

(Quinn is in the car, Monk is already at the office. Has been for ages, since he insists on going in an HOUR BEFORE he has to arrive, because he has a big ol’ boner for his office or something. But that’s another story for another time.)

Quinn’s phone rings.
Q: Good morning.
M: Hello.
Q: What’s up?
M: Nothing, just calling to say hi.
Q: Hi.
M: Hi. (silence)
Q: Oh, traffic yadda yadda
M: Uh huh. (silence)
Q: (silence)
M: (silence)
Q: Okayyy.
M: (silence) Well, I was really just calling to say hi.

And we’re done here.

Or:
(Quinn is at work, buried under the usual load of b.s., Monk is also at his office, perhaps just returning to his desk after doing a round of push-ups in the file room, or adding hot chocolate to his instant oatmeal.)

Quinn’s work phone rings
Q: [Boss Lady]’s office
M: Hello.
Q: Hey, how’s it going?
M: Good, good, just calling to say hi.
Q: Oh, hi.
M: How’s your day going?
Q: Busy, as always (insert some inane office story here)
M: (sounds of typing in the background) Cool, cool.
Q: Are you listening to me or are you trying to multitask?
M: No, I’m just finishing something up (more typing)….
Q: Okay.
M: (silence)
Q: You’re still trying to work and talk, aren’t you?
M: NO! (more typing) … Well, I was really just calling to say hi.

And again, we’re done here.

So you can see the difference. In fact, I’m enjoying our phone conversations so much, that I’m kind of at a loss thinking about tonight, when we will actually be in the same room at the same time (and awake). Now that we have once again experienced the Great Phone People syndrome, I’m a little nervous that we will sit down to dinner and the whole evening will be a bust. How will we, in person, measure up to our phone selves? Do I need to brush my hair? Chew with my mouth closed? What if he expects banter? Clever anecdotes? Gigglefest Part III? Who can deliver that kind of a performance on demand? It’s too much pressure, people!

Maybe I'll just phone it in.

1 comment:

Blogger Lisa said...

I hope you have a fun time together tonight "in person."

How's the sleep thing going?

My hubby got fitted for a mouth piece that is supposed to keep him from snoring. Apparently ALOT of women aren't getting any sleep due to snoring hubbys. The girls at the dentist office all had to talk to him and are eager to hear if his works. Its not cheap ($700.) but we're hoping it will work.

I have thought of you often on this issue because when we sleep in different rooms, I get a good night's sleep but we do start to feel disconnected from each other -- like you've mentioned before in a previous post.

9:35 PM  

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