My head is empty

Any of you planning to spend 20 concentrated hours studying for a little thing called a State Exam this weekend? No? Just me then?


I was going to post earlier and tell you all about Sister's dogs and how they're so out of control that, after another evening of stopping in to feed and water them while Sister was out of town (when what is supposed to be a 20-minute visit stretched beyond 45 because her dogs decided to be assholes and make a game out of running away from me, instead of going back into their pen after they ate), I came home covered in mud and dog shit, thanks in part to the rain shower earlier that day and also because, have I mentioned? Her dogs can be such a bunch of assholes sometimes.

But then I thought, wow, detailing that episode would take so much time, and I was already putting everyone to sleep with the dog training talk- who wants to read another dog-related post in the same week, even if the second one involves a bunch of asshole dogs essentially putting on a Benny Hill sketch in their backyard?

So I didn't mention it.


Another belated story: After two years of living next door to them, I've finally had a full-on conversation with the neighbors. Well, an exchange of pleasantries at least, which was fantastic, considering all I've received from them in the past were hostile looks and silence. A tree trimming extravaganza took place in our neighborhood over the weekend, and out of the blue they offered to cut down the dead one that's been decorating a corner of our yard for the past year. Monk thought they were being nice, but I know better. They were so sick of the gnarled black deadness peeking over the fence at them that they figured Making Nice was a decent exchange for Making It Go Away. Now I'm wondering what else I can uglify to the point that someone else comes and deals with it. Our broken hot tub perhaps? The cement pieces stacked up against the fence? I think this is a plan worth considering.


But I really can't focus on anything except the fact that I'm about to flunk a big test next week- still being the Reigning Champion of Procrastination, I have not studied nearly as much as I thought I would over the last several weeks. I have excuses, just (like my stories) not very good ones. For the next couple of days you can find me tied to a kitchen chair with the ticking bomb of Tuesday's test duct taped to my back, sweating and shaking and mumbling obcenities at the central nervous system, the path of blood circulation, muscles and range of motion, and who the FUCK CARES WHAT YEAR HIPPOCRATES DIED?

Wish me luck or whatever.

2 comment:

Anonymous skyhawk said...

377 B.C. Here's to a good Test Tuesday for both of us!

5:22 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Good luck. I'll be thinking of you. Should I freak out and eat a bunch of candy for you too? Because I can do that!

11:50 PM  

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