Clean slate

Confidential to the ladies: I've just discovered the most effective way to wake yourself up on a Monday morning. Better than green tea, coffee, or a big breakfast. Even better than sitting in traffic for an hour with ABBA blasting over the speakers and then you take a second to look in your rearview mirror and holy shit someone's about to hit you and your NEW CAR! OH MY GOD NOT THE NEW CAR! But they don't, and your racing heart will figure out that everyone's safe in just a second. Phew, that was close.

Yes, more effective than that. I'm sorry the men won't be able to employ this wake-up call to start their work week off with a bang, but that's life. So ladies, one word for you:


Another word: Yowza. And also, hey there! And, top o' the mornin' to ya.

(Well, I guess the menfolk could look into this -or some version of it, at least- for themselves, but I'm thinking they wouldn't be able to take it.)

Nothing like pushing the boundaries of your own comfort level to start the week off right.

8 comment:

Blogger Beckalicious said...

Um. Ouch.

9:09 PM  
Anonymous Pickle said...


Just kidding. Though, kinda hell yeah.

Hey, apropos of nothing: You should rent "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" if you haven't already seen it. I think you'd like it, especially the writing.

We should talk soon.

11:06 PM  
Blogger That Nervous Girl said...

Ha! Feeling a bit of a draft, are we? Yowza is what I have heard from other brave souls like yourself. Also, I would hope that the person administering the Brazilian would be kind and very clinical about it, because I know I would be all self-conscious and nervous because well, that's what I do.

Anyway, I'm glad that was your way of waking up effectively. For a moment I thought maybe the dog threw up in bed again! :)

10:42 AM  
Anonymous skyhawk said...

Gotta say, I feel uncomfortably close to you right now... like I know a LOT more than I should...

Oh well. Air cleaner. 5-speed manumatic transmission. Power steering.

10:28 PM  
Anonymous quinn said...

Skyhawk- I probably should have put a more adamant "read at your own risk" disclaimer up there, but hey, if it brings out the sexy car talk I have no regrets.

Mmmm... power steering.

11:34 AM  
Anonymous quinn again said...

And pickle- if I had known that this was all it might take to get you to call me...

;) nothing but love, baby, no worries.

11:36 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

OUch, ouch, OUCH! You are a braver woman than I am.

2:18 PM  
Anonymous skyhawk said...

Electronic servo-controlled, speed-dependent, variable power steering...

7:21 PM  

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